Invitation Etiquette and Wardrobe

Invitation Text
There are rules of etiquette that are observed when writing an invitation.
Here are some things to remember when you are putting together a more formal invitations:

* Write names in full, including middle names. Omit a middle name if necessary, rather than using an initial.

*It's appropriate to use the British spelling for "honour" and "favour", unless you prefer to use the American spelling of these words.

*No punctuations necessary, except after dates.

*Spell out all words, including hour, the date and the year. Spell out all words in the address, including Street, Road and Avenue.
The two exceptions to this rule in and address in Saint (St.) and Mount (Mt.).

*Use Roman numerals in names, rather than "the third" or "3rd".

*For ceremonies taking place in a house of worship, use "request the honour of your presence."
Ceremonies taking place in a non-religious setting should say, " request the pleasure of your company."

Traditionally, you would address your invitations to "Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Jones"
if your guests are married and she took his surname when she married him.
 If the woman kept her maiden name then you would address it to "Ms. Amanda Smith and Mr. Andrew Jones".
 If they are not married but living together, you put
"Miss Amanda Smith, Mr. Andrew Jones".
So the woman always comes first, except when you are talking about
a married couple with the same surname, as then they are covered by the "Mr. and Mrs." phrase.
If your parents are hosting your wedding and their name is on your invitation, then you follow the same format.

Now that you know the traditional way, feel free to get creative!

 *Many of you have been asking about text regarding gift requests on a insert card. Etiquette says you should never mention gifts, however the reality is
many brides have certain preferences that need to be made known to their guests- and frankly as a guest to many weddings, I like to know these things!
 
We usually handle it with a small enclosure card saying
" No gifts, please. Your presence is you gift to us."

For those who would like to request just money.
" In lieu of gifts, a Money Tree has been provided for you convenience."

Wedding Invitation Envelope Wording

Unsure of how to address wedding invitations? Here are various examples of the wording for formal wedding invitation outer and inner envelopes.

Correct use of Military Rank
on wedding invitations

Navy:     Ensign and higher rank

to
Paul David Brooks
Ensign, United States Navy

Petty Officers and Seamen

to
Paul David Brooks
United States Navy

Army, Air Force and Marines:   

Captain or Higher Rank

to
Captain Paul David Brooks
United States Army

Lieutenant

to
Paul David Brooks
Lieutenant, United States Army

Non-Coms. and Privates

to
Paul David Brooks
United States Army

~~~

Invitation ensembles consist of, but are not limited to, the following items:

Save the Dates~
Your save the date notices will inform your guests of the wedding date and location so that they
can mark it on their calendars and make the necessary travel plans if it is a destination wedding.
Sent about four to six months before the wedding, sooner if the wedding is at a popular location.

Announcement~
If your friends and relatives is larger than the number of guests you are able to invite,
or if you have out of town guests that cannot make it  to your wedding celebration,
announcements work well to spread the good news.
You can use the same wedding invitation as your announcement by simply  changing the wording.
Announcements should be mailed immediately after the wedding, preferably the same day.

Invitation~
Don' run short- plan to order 10% more that the amount needed.
This will take care of last-minute additions and allow for mistakes in addressing envelopes.

 Envelope~
Traditionally, two envelopes are used when mailing invitations or announcements.
Inner envelope: the invitation with any accompanying enclosures/insert cards, is first placed in the inner envelope.
 Simple single lined or unlined envelopes are the new trend for the modern couple that don't feel that a double envelope is necessary.

Reply Card~
Receptions are costly and an accurate guest count is a must.
Reply cards are essential for determining the number of reception guests to plan for.
Enclosed with invitation, a reply card is later returned in the accompanying
printed envelope indicating whether or not guests plan to attend.

Enclosure Card~
Any other information regarding the wedding that guests should know.
A reception insert card is included when the reception is held at a different site than the  actual wedding ceremony.
An Insert card with coordinating directions to the ceremony and the reception site can be very helpful
to your guests (especially out of town guest!)
An accommodation insert card that lists recommended hotels in your area will be appreciated by your guests;
many brides include this in the Save-the-date card or as insert card.

Thank you note are a must!~
Every guest that has given you a gift for the engagement, shower, wedding, or reception  needs to be thanked.
Send them out within two weeks for gifts your receive before the wedding, and no later that one month after you
return from the honeymoon for gifts received the week or day of the wedding.

How to assemble invitation sets together
Main thing to remember is that wedding invitations are assembled by size.
1. Slide the reply card face up beneath the flap of the reply envelope.
2. Set the reply card and envelope facedown on the reception card.
3. Set the reception card (if you have one) face up on top of the invitation.
4. Place the invitation and enclosures in the un-gummed inside envelope ( if you are using one)
with the lettering facing the back of the back of the envelope.  For folded invites,
the fold runs along the bottom of the envelope.
5. Place the inside envelope in the outer mailing envelope so that the
unsealed flap of the inner envelope is not visible.

Other accessories...

Menu Cards~
Menu cards provided at the reception describe the dishes you have selected.
They can be coordinated with the watercolor design chosen for the invitation.

Place Cards/ Table Cards~
If you are planning assigned seating at your reception, put each person's name at the place you have designated.
Place cards may be placed at the coordinating table.
Table cards should be awaiting everyone on a table at the entrance to the reception to direct your guests to their table.

Wedding Fan Programs~
Wedding fan programs provide a creative and practical way to introduce the wedding party with
a list of the names of the wedding party  and perhaps a favorite quote from the bride and groom.
They make great wedding favors for your guests, as well as keep them cool during a warm summer ceremony!

Favor Gift Tags~
You may choose to have custom tags (little notes) printed to attach and coordinate with a party favor for your guests.
These cards may be coordinated with the watercolor design chosen for your invitations

Save the Date Cards~
A very popular accessory for destination weddings where months
of planning is essential for the bride and groom as well as the guest.
Usually sent out six to three months before the wedding ceremony,
depending on the location and travel plans required.

The Timeline...

12 months~
Determine the type of wedding you desire, size, setting, formal or casual.
Select a wedding place, date and time.

9 months~
Start looking for the perfect invitation that reflect the color scheme and style of your wedding.
Get an estimate for the printed pieces you will need.
If you will be using a Save the Date card, you can coordinate the watercolor design with your invitations.

6 months~
Order you invitations and other stationery as soon as your date, time, and place have been confirmed.
Give yourself at least one month to assemble, stamp and hand address each invitation.
Have thank you notes ready to keep current on your thank you notes.

2 months~
Double check your guest list to make sure you have not forgotten anybody.
Mail out of state and out of the country invitations.

6 weeks~
Send out all invitations. Make sure the invitation is weighed and stamped according to the post office.
Our square envelopes do require extra postage.

4 weeks~
Finalize rehearsal dinner plans. Draw up seating plan and create place cards.

2 weeks~
All responses should be in. Follow up on replies not yet received.

Wedding Day~
Eat a good breakfast. Go over your schedule for the day. Deliver your suitcases to your hotel, check in
early if you can so you can relax and not be rushed.
Take a deep breath, and have fun!

~~~

HAWAIIAN WEDDING CEREMONIES
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Hawaiian way of tying the knot!

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copyright 2004-2005 Lenila L. Batali. All rights reserved worldwide.
Reproduction in part or whole prohibited without written consent from Designs by Lenila.

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